FRIDAY! And nothing says FRIDAY like FIESTA! And nothing says FIESTA like AMERICANIZED SEMI-FASTFOOD BURRITOS!
In light of the Chipotle buy one, get one free madness that has been taking Facebook by storm (and yes I do have my coupon and am fantasizing about using it post-work next week, getting two of my favorite burritos, then eating one for dinner on Monday and the other for dinner on Tuesday, whatdon’tjudgeme), I thought I would divulge a recipe that is very near and dear to my heart.
It is no secret that I love trashy Mexican food, burritos in particular. I’m not saying that Chipotle is the epitome of trashy (there are about a million posts referencing Taco Bell on this site if you want true Mexi trash) but we also can’t claim that Chipotle is the essence of true authentic Mexican cuisine, either. But who cares! It is delicious, convenient, relatively healthy compared to a lot of other “on-the-go” choices, and a magical hangover soother!
As much as I like to joke about my more questionable choices in this blog, those who know ~the real me~ will tell you that I am actually pretty conscientious of what I put in to my body, nutritionally-speaking. I have a pretty bad guilt complex if I am not eating fairly healthfully. The tragic flaw of a fat Chipotle burrito is, of course, its excessive amount of calories/fat. Those bitches can pack a wallop. Luckily, my obsessive, nutritionally-neurotic nature led me to do a bit of simple internet research, affording me the knowledge to calibrate a considerably low-cal burrito ingredient combination.
And yes, I know, you can get those burrito “bowls” or taco salads or whatnot, but sometimes they just don’t cut it. I really, really like flour tortillas. Like, more than rice or crackers or most breads.
Anyway:
EMILY’S GUILT-FREE CHIPOTLE BURRITO
So you can have your tortilla, and eat it too.
Flour tortilla – 290 cal
NO RICE! – 0 cal
As I mentioned, I don’t love rice that much, so it’s not a sacrifice to me. You may balk, but honestly? Rice is just bland, dry filler. Plus you’ll be saving yourself 130 cal! Trust me, you really won’t miss it that much.
Black OR Pinto Beans (the choice is yours!) – 120 cal
Fajita Vegetables – 20 cal
So much flavor and texture for only 20 cal, this is a steal.
Barbacoa – 170 cal
Shockingly, barbacoa is the lowest calorie of all the meats, clocking in at 20cal below the rest. Happily, it is also the most flavorful, it definitely has a kick! It’s slow-braised shredded beef with all sorts of spices, and come on, that’s way better than boring chicken breast or something anyway… and secretly better for you! Score.
If you’re a crazy vegetarian (jk, kind of, some of my BFFs are veg) you can sub guacamole and save yourself another 20 cal, as guac is 150.
Corn Salsa – 80 cal
This is a splurge item, but I loooove the corn salsa, and once again it adds a ton of flavor and texture to the burrito, so don’t be afraid. Plus you can feel free to add the green salsa if you want to pack more spice, it’s only 15 cal.
Now comes the part you have been fearing…
NO GUAC, NO CHEESE, NO SOUR CREAM – 0 cal
Ugh, I know, I’m sorry, but I am saving us 370 calories in this maneuver! I promise if you’re eating spicy meat (heh) and a ton of flavorful vegetables you won’t miss the creamy/fatty items that much….
Romaine Lettuce – 5 cal.
Yep, 5. If you want to bulk it up, ask for double romaine, I don’t even care. Go crazy.
TOTAL = 685 calories, 18g fat
It is fresh and delicious and you won’t loathe yourself after you indulge.
To all the haters out there, keep in mind if you add rice, cheese, sour cream, and guacamole, you have added 500 calories and 35 grams of fat to your burrito, for a grand total of 1185 cal, 53g fat…. AHHHH! That is practically my daily allotment of both!
Possibly my favorite beer in the world… SHINER BOCK!
